Draw Near to Me

God never ceases to amaze me.  He talks to me even when I know I don’t deserve for him to even look my direction.  It is true what I’ve heard my entire life, God never moves, we move.

Sometimes it’s totally unintentional.  Other times it’s a blatant move, because we are trying to run form a God who knows our every thought.  This time, for me, it’s been unintentional.  Another familiar pattern (called I-can-control-my-own-life) that I’ve followed once again down into a path of anxious thoughts, self-pity and tears.

This morning as I sat down my my Bible, again I wasn’t sure what I needed to read. What I should read, what God wanted me to hear, what I wanted to say to him.  So, I picked up my favorite devotional and read.

This morning, God’s message: “You will never be in control of your life circumstances, but you can relax and trust in My control.  Instead of striving for a predictable, safe lifestyle, seek to know Me in great depth and breadth.  I long to make your life a glorious adventure, but you must stop clinging to old ways. (CAN I GET AN AMEN?!) I am always doing something new within My beloved ones.  Be on the lookout for all that I have prepared for you.”

There is always something to worry about.  There is always an issue at hand that leaves room for the unknown.  Recently I have been beyond worried about rejection.  I’ve been anxious about the thoughts of mistreatment from those I want to hold dear to me.  I’ve been anxious about what to say or do in the situation. How to “fix” it.  I know this is a lesson God helped me learn over the past couple of years. (Marti. You can’t FIX everything!) 

Psalm 56:3-4
When I am afraid I will trust in you.
In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust;
I will not be afraid,  What can moral men do to me?

This morning as I spend time in reflection, I am again reminded that I am not in control.  When I am in control, things don’t go well.  I am reminded that God knows what is best and that there is nothing that separates me from his love.  I am also reminded that fear, anxiety and worry are not of Christ.  I am reminded that mortal man has no grip on me because my heart and focus is on an eternal Jesus.

I am praying today that God gives me direction.  That I am open to his plan.  That I can feel his presence around me and know he is guiding my path.  I am praying that God is able to calm my spirit when it is anxious and that there is a positive, encouraging solution to circumstances out of my control.

I am praying that I continue to draw near to him.

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